Get decked for charity

Are you tired of your face as presently constituted? Are you sick of looking like a normal human being? Ever wish you had a crater the size of the Grand Canyon where your face used to be?

Well you're in luck, because I'm looking for someone to donate their face to appease my adolescent sports rage!


That's right, for no monetary charge whatsoever, YOUR FACE could occupy the white space above!

Why am I being so generous, you ask? During a loss to the Chicago Bulls Thursday evening, Cavs shooting guard Delonte West took a nasty tumble trying to block a shot by Derrick Rose and suffered a fractured wrist for his efforts. West also needed stiches to close a gash above his left eye and is expected to miss a minimum of 2-3 weeks.

As awesome as that is, Friday marks the beginning of one of our toughest stretches of the season. We start with a home date against the Hornets, then we hit the road for five of our next six, including visits to the Lakers, Blazers, Jazz and Magic. And now that West is hurt, we'll have two starters out the whole time and another who's unsure when he'll return because of the flu!

In other words...things are just FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC in CAVALIERS LAND!

That's why I'm going to let you stick your face where Derrick Rose's used to be! Imagine how much better I'll feel after firing a five-finger fuck-off into your face! You'll taste your teeth in no time! It's even an opportunity to be like Delonte West himself!

"I've been punched in the face many times before, I shook that off," West said.

Now you can shake it off, too! All you have to do is donate to Creative Differences, and DJMomJeans will make sure the anger of 10,000 Cavs fans finds your face!

Sign up today!