It's banal, it's mundane, it's witless, it's obtuse.
It's also true.
When it comes to sports, I'm a loser. Cleveland, Penn State football and United States men's soccer is all I truly give a shit about. And none of them do shit. Not only that, they constantly finds new ways to rip out my intestines and shit where my spleen used to be.
This blog is about Cleveland and Pittsburgh, but this has more to do with Penn State's rectum-rupturing loss to Iowa this afternoon. Between making Rick Stanzi look like Joe Montana, veterans like Anthony Scirrotto making peewee football mistakes late in the game, mind-numbing/boggling playcalling, Bob Griese rooting for the Hawkeyes, and the dreams of ANOTHER FUCKING SPORTS CHAMPIONSHIP ruined, I'm dispondent.
Remember that scene in Happy Gilmore after Happy accidentally killed Chubbs? It's the one where he tells Virginia "Anybody close to me dies. If I were you, I'd run."
If you're also a fan of any of my sports teams, I'd stop rooting for them.
Now, I'm cutting this post off before I decide to quit sports altogether.
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